I never fully understood Song of Solomon 2:15 until recently. I used to think it meant something simple about thoughts and focus, but as I’ve been sitting with it, I’ve realized it’s really pointing to something deeper—what’s happening beneath the surface of our hearts.

“Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom.”
— Song of Solomon 2:15

What God has been showing me is that there are things that can quietly form within us without us even realizing it. And honestly, I’ve had to sit with the reality that there are still areas in me where things have been growing beneath the surface longer than I knew.

Offenses I buried.
Pride that showed up as self-protection.
Resentment I justified.
Unforgiveness I thought I had already moved past.

For a long time, I truly believed that holding onto certain hurts was protection. It felt like I was guarding my peace or setting boundaries. And while I’ve learned that healthy boundaries are important, God began showing me that not everything I called a boundary was actually that. Some of it was unprocessed hurt, unresolved offense—things I hadn’t fully allowed Him to touch yet.

I thought my distance, silence, or how I responded to certain things was protecting me, or even teaching something—but the Lord gently revealed something deeper to me: I was the lesson. God was exposing things in my heart that needed to be brought into the light, not because He was condemning me, but because He was healing me.

“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”— Jeremiah 17:9

“The pride of your heart has deceived you…”— Obadiah 1:3

There are moments where I can see what God is showing me, but still feel myself resisting it internally—not because I don’t want to grow, but because letting go of what I’ve held onto for so long feels unfamiliar, and there are still places in me that wrestle with fear, uncertainty, and the belief that what I’m holding onto is somehow still protecting me.

At times, I also realize I’ve been operating in a guarded posture without fully recognizing it—responding, withdrawing, or internalizing things in ways that felt like protection in the moment, but later I see how much it has actually shaped me and pulled me away from who I was meant to be. And honestly, that’s been hard to really sit with… because it’s one thing to understand something spiritually—it’s another thing to realize you’ve been living out of it for a long time without fully seeing it clearly.

What I’m also realizing is how these things don’t usually show up all at once. They work quietly.

It’s like those “little foxes” don’t come in and destroy everything visibly—they slowly take root beneath the surface. In real time, it can look like me withdrawing instead of processing, holding onto offense instead of releasing it, or replaying things in my mind that I thought I had already surrendered. And over time, what felt like small internal responses begin shaping something deeper in me—how I trust, how I love, and how I show up in relationships and even in my own heart.

That’s what’s been hard to really sit with… that what I thought was just me “handling things internally” was actually something forming underneath that I didn’t fully recognize.

I’m still in this process—learning, unlearning, and allowing God to lead me back into healing and truth. And I won’t lie, it hasn’t been easy. Especially learning to trust again… that’s probably been one of the hardest parts for me. I trust God, but there are still places in me that are learning how to fully trust Him.

What’s been eye-opening is realizing how easily things can take root beneath the surface when life feels full and transitions come quickly. I’ve felt that in different seasons—so many shifts happening at once that I didn’t always have the space to slow down and really notice what was forming in me internally.

And yet, even there, God hasn’t been distant. He’s been steady—bringing me back to what He’s been trying to show me all along: the condition of my heart matters just as much as what’s happening around me. Because what I’ve learned is that what goes unaddressed doesn’t stay small. It just moves quietly beneath the surface until it starts shaping how we see, respond, and even how we trust. So this has really become a place of surrender for me… again and again. Not because I’ve arrived, but because God is still working with what’s underneath. And I think that’s why this scripture has been sitting so heavily with me lately.

As believers, we’re invited into awareness—not just of what looks like growth on the outside, but of what’s happening beneath it. To notice what’s taking root before it begins to shape what God is trying to grow—and to let Him have access to the places we usually try to manage or avoid.

And for me, that’s where the invitation continues—not just to see, but to surrender. Not just to understand, but to allow God into what I’ve been guarding.

Because what I’m learning is that awareness without surrender can still leave us stuck. But awareness with God leads us into healing.

So this is where I find myself again… learning to trust Him in the uncovering, not just in the growth.

Heart Check

• Where do I see myself in this, and what is it revealing about my heart?

• Where have I justified holding onto hurt instead of surrendering it to God?

• What offenses or patterns may still be shaping my heart beneath the surface?

• In what ways has protection turned into guardedness, distance, or disconnection?

•What might God be gently exposing and healing in me right now?

Lord, gently show me what You see in me. Expose what I’ve overlooked, and give me the grace to surrender it without fear.

Carriers of Hope | Breathing hope one life at a time

Sandy Cortes